avva | Когда ты в Нью-Йорке... (по-английски)

natsla прислала замечательную ссылку (чтобы прочесть, требуется бесплатная регистрация) на дискуссию в форуме New York Times на тему "You Know You're a New-Yorker When...".

Вот некоторые из мнений, которые мне особенно понравились (это выборка самого, на мой взгляд, лучшего из более семиста сообщений в форуме):

You know you're a New-Yorker when...

You understand that the plural form of you is yuz.
...you know that if a parking space looks too good to be true, it is
When you open your wardrobe and there's black on black on black and some weird shade that's darker than black.
You know you're a New Yorker when you're making $70,000 and you're "scraping" by.
When you understand this right away: Geddaddaheah. Gwan geddaddaheah. July Kaponchinamaut?
When you think not owning a car is sane and normal..
You look both ways before crossing a one-way street.
You know many intelligent, smart, sober people who do not have a driver's license and have no plans to ever get one.
When you are driving in Texas and you are trying very hard to take it easy and everyone asks, "Are you in some kind of hurry?"
When you find yourself sitting in an extremely crowded restaurant that you didn't have to wait for an hour to get into and think, "I wonder why no one else knows about this place?"
Nothing is north or south, it's uptown or downtown.
When eight dollars for a croissant and a cup of coffee, doesn't seem that bad!!
when you stand on line
...it only takes you 30 seconds to decide whether the person talking to himself is using a cell-phone headset or is crazy.
when you're annoyed that you have to actually cross the street to get to the 24 hr supermarket
...when someone asks you, "Which platform is the number 1 train on?" you respond: "Where do you want to go?"
..when you ask someone for the time and they reply,"what do I look like, a clock?", as they walk away.
You know you're in downtown New York when you walk up to the coffee/donut vendor and say, "I'll take a large coffee with cream", and the person responds with "...Duh, AND SUGAR??"
You know you are a New Yorker when: You meet someone from another city and want to ask them "Why?"
You order a Jack Daniels with Diet Coke and the bartender doesn't flinch.
...when you see a blue-haired guy holding hands with a pink-haired guy, and you think, "How sweet."
... when the "Don't Walk" sign is simply a suggestion to you.
you learned how to drive in Manhattan.
most of the cars you've been in are taxis.
people get really pissed at you when you drive on the highway and you're not sure why
...you don't realize until you're in college that "drawer" is spelled with an "r".
When you read an article about Amnesty International protesting Al Qaeda prisoners being kept in 8' X 6' cages, and you think to yourself...What? That's huge!
... when you've eaten a slice of pizza while jogging to catch your train.
you know you are expected to give directions to a cabbie if you leave Manhattan
You know you're a real New Yorker when you've travelled on the subway for a year and never once made eye contact with any other passenger.
you have to submit an application for kindergarten in a public school, arrange for an interview and send in his test scores
When you're annoyed, instead of excited, that they're making a movie on your block.
when you know the best pizzeria in the whole entire universe, keep telling all your friends and beg them to keep it a secret.
When your doctor's bill is $15 and your dog's is $301
When you sneak your own popcorn into the movies
you can't be bothered to talk to the celebrities you see on the street.
When you can get 10 different types of ethnic foods delivered at midnight.
...out-of-town guests start complaining at 10:00 pm about how tired they are just about the time that you're getting hungry for dinner.
...the conversation about how to get from the Upper East down to Soho takes longer than the actual trip itself.
You know you are a New Yorker when your street-parked car has a "No Radio" sign in the window.
you refer to the "subway" as "the train".....
you know never to take the bus in the city whether you are in a hurry or not....
When you're in a movie theatre and people laugh at the right time and in the right places.
You Know You're a New Yorker when someone bumps into you, and you check for your wallet.
When you accept the fact that the cats you see late at night by garbage cans are really super rats.
You know you're a New Yorker when the "shortest time span known to man" is the time between the light turns green and the guy behind you honks his horn.
You walk into a courtroom and see a jury composed of twelve people who among them can speak about 15 different languages.
You're a New Yorker when breakfast is Kosher, lunch is Thai, dinner is Northern Italian, the wine is from Sonoma, the movie is French, the midnight snack is tapas with a microbrew, and that's just Friday.
..when you understand this:
"Jeet yet?"
"No jew?"